Emo Grass Cuts Itself

*Steps onto soapbox*

I've avoided the topic enough...let's talk about the disturbing trend of what has become known as Emo. This is directly only at Emo guys, as there is pretty much no discernible difference between an Emo Girl and a Goth Girl.
Emo's arise at the painful part in life (i.e puberty) when a man's emotions start to switch on and you realize life is alot more complicated then what you're wearing to school that day or who will be your study buddy for geography. Ten to twelve years ago when I was beginning this painful journey, I was not only a teen who was becoming alive in body and soul, I was the most pissed off ball of teenage anx my family and my hometown had ever left eyes on. What made it worse, is that I was the quiet, stewing kind of pissed off. I'd certainly rarely get into peoples' faces...but I'd rather play passive aggressive, and get my friends to crap down the chimney's of their houses. Teenage boys during this period in life should be a symbol of all the fury in the world unleashed in the body of a single human. These are the times when they start fights for no reason, go shopping cart bowling with their parents cars, and commit random acts of malicious mischief for no reason.
Teenage boys should NOT be wearing girls jeans, should NEVER be in touch with their feelings (unless it's pure rage), and should realize how LAME it is to cut for attention. Was I a cutter? You bet your ass, but after I was finished, I didn't show it off and cry for attention. I'd say it started because when you were my size and weight, fighting people in school wasn't an option. The only time I ever busted those things out was to clear a path around my locker or ensure I would go untouched through the halls. People fear things they don't understand, but no body's afraid of an Emo.
So now what? Goth and Punk got together and had a gay baby we call Emo. Emo has given rise to a bunch of bands *cough cough Jimmy Eat World cough Panic At The Disco cough cough*. Not only do they sully the great names of Punk & Goth artists alike by twisting those sounds into the stabby-stabby-slash-slash crap they listen to, but the movement towards guys in nut-hugging jeans has all but eliminated the need for big pants. And by big pants, I refer to the magestic JNCO jeans. How has history evolved from the time of the Spartans where men were looked to be the model of creation, muscles and able feats dominated what was considered ideal and successful...to guys emulating women like a bunch of shitty, unskilled drag queens performing for walking around money? No idea.

So the message here is my little Emo douches, stop getting in touch with your feelings and start getting in touch with your nuts. You're contributing to the ever weaking male image and quite frankly, you're embarrassing some of us that used to call ourselves Goth because people don't know enough to discern the difference. Get bigger pants, cut your f#&king hair, and for God's sake, put the damn disposable razor down. If I see one more kid with a bunch of (non-bleeding) scratches up his arm standing around crying eye liner in paint on jeans, I'm going to force feed him pork, porn, and potatoes until he either grows a pair or explodes.

Ahem *steps off soapbox*