"Hope Is The First Step On The Road To Disappointment"

So now that the New Year is here, I'm fully expecting to see the usual influx of people at the gym that have for some reason put off getting physically fit until a new year starts. And I know in 60-90 days, I'll see a void in place of where these new gym members once were.
Resolutions to me are pretty much the way a person says "I'm going to change......but I'll wait until 01 January to do it"..(i.e. a long term version of 'I'll start/quit x, but I'll start tomorrow). I've always firmly believed that if you don't like something, change it immediately. Don't wait for a new year, don't wait for your friends, just...fix it. The reason why I've seen so many people fail in their resolutions is simple. First, resolutions are a "big thing", where as someone sitting around saying "hmm, I shouldn't smoke" isn't. This way, if you slip up for fail, you don't feel like a colossal douche, and you keep work at getting better. Secondly, if you don't set resolutions, you don't fail, just as long as you stick to the "fix things immediately" point of view.
Speaking of resolutions and people at the gym, I've also noticed an increase of personal trainers at the gym. Now while I do admire people who hire help to get in shape quicker, I don't buy into the fact that these trainers know more about the client's body then the client does. Sure, I personally have been exposed to literally thousands of hours of different exercises designed to prepare someone for war, but exercise is pretty intuitive. If you're fat and don't wanna be, then run (noooo, don't get on the treadmill and walk fatty...we all know running burns more fat then walking...hell, I'll refrain from poking fun at your gravy thighs if you can at least give me a slow jog). If you wanna get big, lift weights. Proper lifting method? Don't use your back...that's pretty much all you really need to know. At least 30 minutes a session, at least 3 days a week. More questions? Google that beast!
However, back to the item of the personal trainer. Now in the light that I look at personal trainers with some contempt, I looked at this one with an extra special dollop of contempt because this personal trainer was FAT (ahem..24 Hour Fitness). How in the heeeell can someone who's got a beer gut give fitness advice to someone who was skinnier then them?
To expound, the following is a list of people I would not take advice and/or services from if they were fat:

- Personal Trainer
- Life Coach
- Motivational Speaker
- Someone teaching leadership skills
- A Doctor
- A Nutritionist
- Spokesman for a Diet Product
- Spokesman for Exercise Equipment
- A Hippy (although I rarely do, what the hell could a hippy eat that would make them fat?)

And the following list is people I would be more willing to take advice/services from if they were fat:

- A Chef

Hmmm...the scales seem a bit tilted