That's About Enough

Any consistant reader of this blog probably knows by now that I'm not a fan of the "breeders" of society. People that make it their mission in life to crap out as many children as human possibly, and beating their chests about how proud they are for...well...I guess doing what mankind has been doing since the dawn of time. No, congratulations are not in order, becoming pregnant is not an accomplishment. Finishing a marathon is an accomplishment. Getting a 4.0 on your report card is an accomplishment. Getting pregnant is not an accomplishment. Seriously. If it can be done by accident, something tells me it's not entirely praiseworthy. "Whoops! I got a perfect score on my biology test!"

Beyond my loathing of children, is my loathing of parents who think of themselves king/queen sh*t because they successfully had sex. Let me put the answers in very succinct terms:

• No, I don't care about how old your kid is.
• No, your kid is not cute.
• No, pregnancy is not beautiful at all. And for men who say they've never been more turned on by their wives until they were pregnant are probably men who weren't getting any sex from their wives until her hormones clicked on 6 weeks in to being pregnant.
• No, I don't intend to have kids of my own.
• No, I don't care if "it's different when they're my own".
• No, your kid doesn't have ADHD, he's just stupid.

Of course who am I to nay say this whole time. Lemme turn this ship around:

• Yes, I unfriended you on Facebook because you changed your profile picture to a close up face shot of your ugly offspring.
• Yes, I firmly believe that parents who don't have their children vaccinated are completely retarded.
• Yes, people should be required to get a license to breed. Kind of a bigger thing then driving a car right?
• Yes, I think breastfeeding is an abomination. And if you even get started on the whole "natural" arguement, I will take a sh*t right here on the ground in front of you. I mean it's natural right?
• Yes, you will pee, puke, poop, and fart in a room of complete strangers during childbirth (read: yeah, not a beautiful thing).
• Yes, were I ever stupid enough to knock someone up, my a$$ would be in the waiting room during delivery.

I've said it all too often, but the more I complain about it, the more I'm seeing a trend. This country is getting a bit too soft. Why? Probably because there is increasingly heavy focus placed on having kids, having a family, blah blah blah. So much to the point where now policies and legislation is becoming almost parent driven. Even the military provides for more benefits for the married and parents.

Not that I'm bitter, but yeah, you're kids look stupid.