I'm Going To Wii All Over You

So if I were to tally up all the time I spent playing video games growing up, I'm sure I would be angry in the fact that I could have used all that time to learn something more useful, like ice sculpting with a chainsaw.

But as I take a less active role in today's gaming, I'm beginning to notice a pretty horrible trend that I can't allow to continue forward without at least saying something.

MSN.com Games - Essentially there are several distinct genres of games on MSN that are limited to a few, a very small few. Casino games, the switch-and-match games (i.e. Gems, Chainz, etc.etc.etc.etc.etc.), and pointless "Space Invader" knockoffs. These games have recently become just a platform for advertising, so they now entice us with "badges", which are essentially little icons (probably stolen from X-Box 360) to further advertising needs. But whatever, I'm addicted to online Texas Hold-Em, so I'll deal with their shameless Alltell Wireless plugs.

Nintendo - Although originally invented on the ATARI (go ahead and bet me on this, I'll show you the game), Mario and his Bro have continued to infest Nintendo for decades now. Originally novel during the Mario 1, 2, and 3...the greatness began to knock off after Dr. Mario and the seemingly unended variations on the old Mario games or Tetris. Tetris at least had the fortitude to die off quickly. And for the record with the new Wii, I play video games because I want to escape reality and be a slug on the couch. Controllers and games that require me to work up a sweat are the very antithesis of what gaming should be. If I want to "actually hit a tennis ball", I'll go out an play tennis. KILL MARIO!

Nintendo 64 - *cough*failure*cough* huh?

Sega Dreamcast - Who?

Sega Saturn - What?

XBox 360 - Although I was originally I was anti-Xbox due to my premature loyality to Playstation, the Xbox360 has actually turned my favor towards it. Non-stop games & downloadables are the best option about it. My only beef with this gaming system is the fact that nerdy little show-offs that don't know where "outside" is or why they would want to "play" there get to talk over headsets to other gamers. And it's never an intelligent saying either, it's either some "gay" remark, or someone trying to make futile alliances prior to a game of Halo 3 kicking off.

Playstation 3 - $600 for a game system? FUUUUUUCK YOU!

Personal Computers - Ideal for 1st person shooters due to the ease of control between the mouse and keyboard, my only beef is actually with game manufactures themselves. They have distinct problems or failures with games (or software in general) they produce:

1) They create an awesome game that requires a video card that hasn't been invented yet.

2) They create an awesome game for a certain operating system, operating system gets replace years later, and they don't re-release the game for the new operating system. I have lost COUNTLESS of good games to O/S upgrades. Why the hell wouldn't an old program work on a new system? Good one Bill!

3) Membership fees for online shooter games. Never. On XBox yes because it's for MANY games...I will not pay $29.95 a month for one game that I will get bored of in 2 months and toss.

4) Not enough pirate games! 'Nuff said.

PSP - What a horrible investment.