So another ending of a long week bringing me closer to hanging out with Oregon-B. I've been cutting down on drinking unconsciously, however, I have the sinking feeling I'll be changing my name to "Vlasic" before the weekend is over.
Recent three jobs, let's review:
Punk Cop: Ms. Avril Lavigne?So this weekend, the Oregon-B will be coming up for a short lived stay of debatchery and drunkeness. I'm pretty sure we'll be attempting to recall our year in college together, however, now introduce livers of steel, a penchant for XBox Live, and severe and infallable craving for Jack In The Box Ultimate Cheeseburgers. All of this times the fact that Oregon-B probably hasn't cashed in his crazy tickets in a while will promise for a good time.
I'm reminded many times of being stuff in our tiny college apartment either playing Final Fantasy, getting ready to go to school, or attempting to eat every last pizza in our hometown in one sitting. Only a few times did we have parties there, because again, it was freaking tiny. But still, a good drunk fest had by all.
I'm pretty sure Monday's blog will be very interesting to say the least.
Good times - Noodle salad.
So occasionally during the weekends, I get random thoughts. Unfortunately, I never keep a timely log of these, so I usually forget them...but here's a small glass of crazy from my crazy stream of thought.
After I joined the Army, the concept of a "holiday" was quickly lost to me. Especially in the Military Police, you find it pretty much accepted that you work on Holidays as you would any other day.
So finally it's come down to this...I actually have to upgrade my disliking for children and their parents from an entry to a rant. I haven't hit the WTF guns yet because, well, I've successfully been avoiding the little wastes of carbon and their "all-knowing parents" for a while now.Foreign Adoption - Do we hate our own countrymen this much that we decide that "exotic" children are better then the homegrown? No, I know, it's apparently more "charitable" to adopt from foreign countries because otherwise the babies would grow up in poverty. Nooo, even better, it's "easier" to adopt from those countries then it is from the United States...Hmm, very intriguing arguments, but they're all as dumb as the parents that believe them. I can't even begin to see an ethical reason that justifies adopting foreign children over domestic. It might be easier to do, but at the cost of de-regulation, you also have babies being stolen for the black market, and I would go so far as to argue that this would encourage parents who can't support children overseas to have them anyway, so some American can swing in and scoop a couple up at $10k a pop. More charitable? What about the thousands of foster kids that get bounced around the United States year after year? Apparently just because they're being abused in a First World Country, it makes these parents more holy to adopt from kids being abused in a Third World Country. If you're in such a mad rush to get your hands on a kid and be parents, buy a f#*king dog instead. If you're ready to be responsible parents, you might just be patient enough to wait.
Circumcision - Ah yes, one of the questions once again being called up and being labeled "abuse" by the weaker parents that apparently believe that they shouldn't make any efforts to do what's good for the child without the child's consent. So let's review the facts. This procedure has been proven to reduce cancer, reduce the risk of STD transmission, and increase the amount of stimulation during sex. Hm, sounds good. Let's look at the negatives...hmmm, can't really seem to find any...hmm. Now, let's review some of the "not-fit-to-be-parents" arguments. First - "it's barbaric", no, it's a medical procedure that causes no lasting pain or disfigurement in the person's life. Second "the kid should be allowed to choose the procedure when they're old enough" - I can't imagine, at any time, where I would elect to have this done at my age. I'm pretty much past my sexual prime, so barring safe sex practices, it would have been pointless to elect this procedure now. Third - "it's an unjustifiable tribute to God" - Alrighty. My parent elected this procedure for me (yeah, I said it), and I know that it wasn't done with the intent of following the Judo-Christian belief that makes it a point to do so. They did it out of concern for my future health. My parents did something they knew would be beneficial for me...which makes it GOOD, even if they didn't ask...that what called "being parents" means. And finally my favorite - "it's no different then the sexual mutilation of females in Africa" - Okay, back the f#(king Rice-O-Roni trolley up as we review biology. Despite the fact that, yes, men and women both have gentals in the same region, they are, by no means wired exactly the same. Last I checked, I've can experience 100% feeling in my goods, and for those women that comment about the hideous scar, I see my goods everyday and there isn't a scar to be seen.
Sleep - Why the hell is it that when I was 8 or 9, I was required to be in bed no later then 8 pm...but now when I'm going to Denny's after a heavy night of drinking and booze related debatchery, I'm seeing 1 and 2 year olds sitting across the way from me at 1 am? At what point did parents decide that in order to ensure their night life didn't suffer, they'd just keep their snotlings up with them? I am still waiting for the day that I go to either a porno store or a bar and see some parent in there with a kid slung over their shoulder. Are you f#(king kidding me. At some point the balance of self-sacrifice tipped from pointing at the parents to pointing at the kids. My parents pretty much resigned a nightlife at the birth of my oldest brother. Sure, occasionally a neighbor's teen was hired to babysit on the few instances that they were REQUIRED to attend an Army function, but at no point can I fathom being 5 years old, at sitting at some resturant well past 10 pm.
In closing, my rant is boiled down to this fact. Not everyone is fit to be a parent. Just because you are a parent, doesn't mean you're a good one. If and when you have a kid, it is YOUR responsibility. Just because the saying is "it takes a village to raise a child" that sure as hell doesn't mean the village wants to. It is every parents obligation to make the tough choices which will better their child, even if it's "hard". If you take the "I'm-going-to-be-their-best-friend" approach, you will not only fail miserably as a parent, but you'll put another self absorbed dumba$$ into the world as well. As for me, I plan on circumcising, vaccinating, spanking, and bottle feeding my children. They sure as hell won't have a video game console, and they sure as hell will eat their vegetables. McDonald's won't even be in their vocabulary.
And Mad Props To This Guy - The Ultimate Word in ParentingSo over the weekend, my average score in life has been less then stellar. Let's review shall we?
- Cats took a ginormous dook in the carrier right when we go to the Vet, requiring me to announce it immediately to the Vet's assistant upon arrival.
- Tried making Jambalya for the first time, too spicy.
- Played Halo 3 Sunday morning. Not being used to this, by body inferred it as being night time, and I started to drink.
- In said process of gaming and drinking, not only did I forget to eat all day (which is why I ended up trashed), but I also blinked out at around 6pm and waking up at 2 am and wondering why I was on the couch, and why I was wide awake.
- In said process following gaming and drinking, I learned that despite not being drunk or even hungover, apparently the body loses ALL muscular strength and endurance when you haven't eaten in over 24 hours. Suffice to say, the treadmill beat me down good.
- Having really not eaten until after I was at work, let's just say my seven story stair climb was less then awesome today.
-And to add, Towel-Returning-Girl was at the gym this morning.
-Finally, a moment of Blog silence for my oldest brother's blog coming to an end. Citing too much work and personal issues, he's "letting the stage go dark" on his blog. My brothers and I never had a real close relationship until recently, so I really appreciated the opportunity to see into his thoughts, and get what he actually remembered about the family and growing up. Maybe now I'll tell him that I've been reading his blog every morning since discovering it. He's been blogging for several years now, and I can confidently say I read and savored every post.
So in thinking about my fears, few vividly come to mind. I'm afraid of deep water, partially submerged objects in said water, and attractive girls I don't know. I imagine it's probably the combination of my mother teaching me to respect womanhood at the threat of pain and being consistantly shot down by girls during the most vulnerable phase in my life...adolescence.
So in light of my recent down turn in partying and heading to the bars, I took some time to reflect on some of the colossal failures ( and somewhat successful) house parties I've been to in my shindig career.So over the weekend, I decided it was time to get my haircut renewed as it was starting to make me feel like a damn dirty hippy. I went to the same location as I usually go (*cough*Supercuts*cough*) and proceeded to commence the standard 20 minute wait for a on par haircut.
Now before I go further, allow me to put this all into reference. Army barber shops are 100% the reverse of civilians. Instead of there being a line of 10 people and 2 barbers, Army barber shops usually have between 5-7 barbers at all times. (The Army barber shop is run by AAFES, a civilan contractor business that caiters exclusively to the military - you can also go to "The Strip" which is the area outside Army posts that are usually barber shops, laundrymats, dry cleaners, and porn stores) These shops are 100% for men, for if you're female, you need to go to the beauty salon next door (same deal...about 3-5 stylists there - same price). These barbers are usually wives of servicemen, elderly folk that need a job, or relatives of Korean families. They are demonically fast at cutting hair, mostly because military don't walk in and want to have a quaff of hair like Colin Farrell. However, they are quick to adapt to any spin off of the buzz-cut and generally do a good job. In my time in the Army, I usually kept an inch or so of hair, and the quickest haircut I received was well under 2 minutes. The cost in and about the Army post is usually about 4-6 bucks.
So back to the story. In the process of waiting 20 minutes and listing to the hair stylists banter on about their kids and how having them is supposed to make them instantly good people, I realized I drank too much tea for breakfast, and had to use the bathroom. Of course upon my return, I learned I had lost my spot in line, but understandably so. So I continued waiting. A full hour after getting there (including bathroom time), I'm finally called to a station amidst angry stares from multi-child parents who obviously believe they took priority because it was their little puke-ling's first haircut. I proceed to explain what I want to the stylist the way I have been doing for the past seven years. "Medium fade with some off the top, no skin". She proceeds to gear up and apparently with no regard for the "some off the top", buzzes my head at the same length all over. The shock I felt as she buzzed directly through my bangs quickly resigned to more of a "son of a b$tch, I can't wear a hat to work" attitude. She even decided to point out, as though I didn't already know having lived with it for almost 30 odd years, that I had an especially pointy occipital bone. Derr.
So in losing an hour of my life, wading through a sea of grubby, snot nosed little carpet rats, and getting my hair screwed up for the next 3-5 weeks, I only had to pay $15.
I almost gave Supercuts the WTF logo, but decided otherwise because I'm hoping this is an isolated incident. If not, they're getting it twice fold.
It's Veteran's day, so I'm leavin' work early. No bloggy. Yet crazy stories from the weekend to come.
So in attempting to make the workplace more hospitable, I was sent to the local Salvation Army to pick up a small, padded chair similar to a non-reclining, miniture lazyboy. Unbenounced to me, the chair was too big, however, reinforcements (with a truck) had been dispatched. So there I sat for a solid 20 minutes in the parking lot, doing my favorite past time, people watching.
So always in an effort to remain positive, I try to think about the things I do on a daily basis that will keep me healthy and will promote a long and healthy life. I do things such as:
Ah Denny's, the only place where you can eat food that tastes good while simultaniously killing your body off in the process.I'm always happy to see when people reach certain goals they've set for themselves. Be it losing weight, stop smoking, or otherwise. But one goal that really confuses me is when people, who historically love coffee to the point where'd they'd make out with Juan Valdez, decide they need to quit drinking caffinated coffee, if not coffee altogether.
I first began my taste for coffee in high school. Growing up in a small town, all there was to do was go to the local resturant and drink coffee and talk with friends. Given at first, I hated the taste of it like no other, I eventually got used to it...even so far as I only take one packet of sugar in it occasionally. I laugh because this makes most people cringe. It's been my proverbial "tackling fuel" all through college and the Army, and I still pound down a gallon or two a week, just to keep in good stead (and it helps me get through the slow HR times).
I can understand that people think that just because this is an "addiction" (i.e. there's adverse biological reactions to not "getting your fix" after you've drank coffee for a while), it's not exactly the evil that being addicted to alcohol or drugs is. Short of staining your teeth and getting alittle caffinated buzz on it, there are no known downsides of drinking coffee. I'm not sure what these people imagine is really in it, but all it truely is is a big cup of burnt bean boiling water.
Referencing the following links, you can even see how it can help you. Up to and including reducing your chances of diabetes, Parkinson's, colon cancer, liver cirrosis, and gallstones to name a few. Hell, it even reduces the amount of lung and liver damage from heavy smoking and drinking!
Again, with one day while putting the WTF tyrade to a rest, I sincerely question people's motives when they decide to put down the coffee cup. Sure while tea is good too, and no, I don't condone the 300 calorie triple-mocha-frappa-spanka-wheezy from Starbucks that cost $5, I will argue that unless it's the price of coffee that's deterring you ($1?), you better not be a bandwagon "I'm quitting coffee" and start bragging around me, I'll dump a big ol' cup in your crotch.
Me and Folger's are like brothers son!
Link 1 - So you quit?
No blog today ladies and gents. This blogger has been used up by insurance paperwork. Wheeee!
Again, I'd like to reiterate the fact that I mostly try to stay away from hot button and political issues in my blog. I feel those topics are better left for debate between "know-it-all" politicians and people who think they'll get some where arguing over the Internet.
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