...Two Bits...

So over the weekend, I decided it was time to get my haircut renewed as it was starting to make me feel like a damn dirty hippy. I went to the same location as I usually go (*cough*Supercuts*cough*) and proceeded to commence the standard 20 minute wait for a on par haircut.

Now before I go further, allow me to put this all into reference. Army barber shops are 100% the reverse of civilians. Instead of there being a line of 10 people and 2 barbers, Army barber shops usually have between 5-7 barbers at all times. (The Army barber shop is run by AAFES, a civilan contractor business that caiters exclusively to the military - you can also go to "The Strip" which is the area outside Army posts that are usually barber shops, laundrymats, dry cleaners, and porn stores) These shops are 100% for men, for if you're female, you need to go to the beauty salon next door (same deal...about 3-5 stylists there - same price). These barbers are usually wives of servicemen, elderly folk that need a job, or relatives of Korean families. They are demonically fast at cutting hair, mostly because military don't walk in and want to have a quaff of hair like Colin Farrell. However, they are quick to adapt to any spin off of the buzz-cut and generally do a good job. In my time in the Army, I usually kept an inch or so of hair, and the quickest haircut I received was well under 2 minutes. The cost in and about the Army post is usually about 4-6 bucks.

So back to the story. In the process of waiting 20 minutes and listing to the hair stylists banter on about their kids and how having them is supposed to make them instantly good people, I realized I drank too much tea for breakfast, and had to use the bathroom. Of course upon my return, I learned I had lost my spot in line, but understandably so. So I continued waiting. A full hour after getting there (including bathroom time), I'm finally called to a station amidst angry stares from multi-child parents who obviously believe they took priority because it was their little puke-ling's first haircut. I proceed to explain what I want to the stylist the way I have been doing for the past seven years. "Medium fade with some off the top, no skin". She proceeds to gear up and apparently with no regard for the "some off the top", buzzes my head at the same length all over. The shock I felt as she buzzed directly through my bangs quickly resigned to more of a "son of a b$tch, I can't wear a hat to work" attitude. She even decided to point out, as though I didn't already know having lived with it for almost 30 odd years, that I had an especially pointy occipital bone. Derr.

So in losing an hour of my life, wading through a sea of grubby, snot nosed little carpet rats, and getting my hair screwed up for the next 3-5 weeks, I only had to pay $15.

I almost gave Supercuts the WTF logo, but decided otherwise because I'm hoping this is an isolated incident. If not, they're getting it twice fold.